Archiv der Kategorie: Relationship

Faith

So I have been shooting a #Documentary concerning my life… It is one of my heart desire not to die without impacting people’s life. I want to leave everything here on earth, so that when the day of departure comes – I can look Him in the eye and say I gave everything you’ve given me. Here’s an short outlook…enjoy!  #FAITH

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The cycle of Relationships

It is interesting to see, how people jump from one relationship to the next; in hopes of finding, what was missing in the previous relationship. Let me tell you – the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. What you see isn’t necessarily what you’re going to get – looks are deceiving. If you don’t learn to water your own seed; every new beginning will not last. I’m not telling you to stick within a place where you don’t feel comfortable, although it would be right because growth happens in uncomfortable places. However, in order to start something new one is in need of a solid foundation. A solid foundation is the base of every new beginning.

Happiness is not found it is something YOU OWN – either you have it or you don’t!

The only way for you to own it is to learn how to sow it. Teach yourself how to be happy and nurture your happiness. Nobody else is going to be happy for you, if you don’t learn to be happy for yourself.

Nevertheless, if you feel the urgency of leaving somebody behind don’t jump into the next relationship. Learn to stay with yourself. There are always two sides to a story, the person you’ve left or left you don’t own every mistake. You too played your part, so try to figure out what you could have done better. Too many are afraid of being alone, I know being single isn’t popular (going into my 5th year lol), but I rather be single than to be miserable beside the next person.

The lack of making a distinct effort concerning the relationship is the reason why so many people end up in break ups. I can’t say much about marriage since I’m not married, but I believe that this somehow applies to the divorce rate too. We expect people to treat us a certain way. We wish for them to be this and that and all of the above. Yet fail to appreciate them for who they are and what they’re actually doing. Sometimes two just need to stick it out and be committed to one another. Both of you all are crazy… we tend to say that women are crazy, but we are ALL somehow crazy. You just need to find the amount of craziness you can put up with and live with it.

The beauty in a relationship isn’t found in what the person can do for you. The beauty lies in having – two crazy people staying committed to one another, growing and forming something beautiful.

There’s no relationship on earth that’s perfect. Stop looking at other people’s relationship. Stop believing the lies couples post up on social media and start working on YOUR OWN relationship. Groom your man/woman into whom you wish for them to become.

Woman, speak to the King in him. Man, speak to the Queen in her.

Treat each other as the both of you deserve – not with a love that fluctuates – but with an unconditional love that you’ve received from God.

And if it isn’t working out at all and you need to leave that person then do it. But give yourself some time to evaluate both sides. Learn from your mistakes as much as you’re learning from the mistakes he/she did. Don’t settle for the wrong person because somebody told you your standards are too high. Nevertheless, make sure you are living up to the standards you have created! Ladies, don’t pray for a Godly man, if you aren’t doing what God wants from you. Men don’t expect your future wife to be a virgin, if you are out there slanging.

Remember, you reap what you sow and you always attract what’s within you. I’m speaking out of experience – trust me.

The truth is everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the one/s worth suffering for. – Bob Marley

Thank you for reading 🙂 until then, be blessed.

© Alfred Ntiamoah and authenticity2015

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Alfred Ntiamoah and authenticity with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 Why women shouldn’t seek after men.

You know without being too spiritual, I’ll explain to you in a simple way, why women should not seek after men. I have found it extremely disturbing to see women take on a position they haven’t been equipped for. I say this not to offend women,  I’m not a misogynistic – I love y’all, but it’s important for women to know this. As a woman, I assume, you’re hoping for a man that’s mature enough to understand what’s important in life and take lead. Some just wait and have fairy tale thoughts of prince charming, while others take on the challenge and go on consistent dates. However, whenever a woman starts to date, whereas she’s specifically seeking for someone, the result of it – mostly– doesn’t meet her expectations. I know I’m not speaking for everyone, but I’m sure a few can relate.

Why are those expectations rarely met?

Life was created in order and structure; everything we do has to abide to its „rules“. If you want to lose weight – you’re required to a healthy diet and working out. If you want to gain further education & understanding – you’re required to study, go to school and read. So, shortly said, every desire requires an action and this being done in order with structure. It’s impossible to just sit and hope for a job without filling out applications. I think you get it… So what does this have to do with women not to seeking men? A relationship between a man and a woman has its own rules & guidelines, which is based on the foundation I just mentioned earlier: order & structure. Male are natural born hunters, if a man sees something he wants – he is going to get it. However, if he is not interested  – he won’t pay any attention to it. It’s simple. A woman on the other hand is different; women are more likely to develop the role of becoming a wife. They play with Barbie’s, love to baby sit (the only example that I could come up with lol) and hope for prince charming to come around and find them. In short, women are supposed to be hunted by men!

Okay, so what happens when a woman takes on a different role and starts to be the hunter? In my opinion, a woman is going against nature. I’m not saying that women aren’t supposed to take on leadership positions, but this is how I view it. There are multiple reasons for women to get frustrated while dating men. I’ll try to break it down and give you two examples:

  1. When a woman is fed up being by herself and starts to go men hunting – the woman takes on a role she’s spiritually, mentally, emotionally & physically not equipped for. This could result in dating a man that is completely lazy in all four stages (spirit, mental, emotion & physical).
  2. Because women are emotional (affectionate) a man is more likely entering the date thinking – all she wants is some physical attraction – whereas the woman is actually, unfortunately not always, seeking for true love.

What happens here is a complete turn around in order and structure – no longer is the man actively and passionate about getting what he wants, but has q tendency of being lazy and viewing the women as an easy catch. Here’s the clue ladies, if you want to be treated as the princess your dad said you are; stop searching for prince charming and live like the princess you’re ought to be. It’s getting tiring to hear women going on dates, to have a few connections with some guys, but then end up hurt because they’ve given themselves up too easy. It’s not only your fault ladies; us men are to blame too.

Many men know that they aren’t interested in certain women, yet because the woman makes herself so available – they don’t see anything wrong pleasing her physical need and move on. THAT’S WRONG! I can say that’s wrong because I used to do the same. I would date certain women, knowing that I’m not interested in them, but because they made it easy for me – I  saw nothing wrong in taking advantage of them. I say this not to brag, honestly this was immature of me – but I say this so you (men) don’t continue the same mistakes I did. Men, when you’re not interested in a woman – let her know; especially when she insist on it and tries sleeping with you. Women, if a man isn’t showing much interest, you have to know that there’s NOTHING wrong with YOU – just stop throwing yourself on him. It’ll benefit both parties.

Going back to the points I made – a man is there to lead, provide and protect. Whenever a woman throws this out of proportion, the man is being stripped of his position. You might not think that it’s that deep, but it really is. As a man you want to show your trophy, you want to be the one that brags saying: “ Look what I caught isn’t she beautiful? & Yes she’s mine don’t touch her!” Now, if this doesn’t happen and a woman does all of it, it hurts a man pride and makes order and structure ineffective. Men, know that I’m speaking of matured men, will no longer feel the need to lead, provide or protect. He wasn’t required to put in any work, so he has nothing to be proud of. The point that I’m making is that – we and I mean everybody men and women – have to come back to our given nature and stop going against it.

Ladies, if you want to be in a relationship but cannot find the right man – stop seeking and start working on yourself. It’s simple – you attract what’s within you. Work on your relationship with God, yourself and your goals. This is how you create a standard and men will respect you. Men will the know that they’ll have to have something going for themselves in order to meet/get/date you. It’s going to take while because men take longer maturing, but once this is understood and he truly wants you – HE WILL NOT STOP PURSUING YOU!

A short advice to the Men: if you know that you aren’t ready and are not interested in her, please – let her know and stop playing with her emotions. You’re not just hurting her, but you’re also making it hard for the next guy, who’s actually serious about it. I know I said I wasn’t going to be spiritual, but I just have to back this up with some scripture – for the haters LOL! Genesis 2:20-23 speaks about the creation of Eve. God took Eve out of the rib of Adam. Adam was the first person in the Garden of Eden, when Eve got added unto him – she wasn’t completely aware of her location. She had no knowledge of the things in the Garden. It was Adam who showed her around and taught her everything. Imagine Eve would have just taken on the role of Adam and try to instruct him and teach him on the things God has placed in the Garden. Everything would have been confused because she had no proper knowledge. I’m glad it didn’t go that way because this allowed order and structure to be functional. Ladies, allow a man to be a man and be the woman you have to be. I truly believe that if we stick to the nature of how God created things to be – we’re better off and will cause less hurt to one another. I hope this helped you Until then, God bless you :)!

© Alfred Ntiamoah and authenticitee2015

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Alfred Ntiamoah and authenticitee with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.